On this day, 25 years ago...

Yeap, that's right. I turn a quarter of a century year old today.

Bottoms up! Yeah.

Once again

I've let things slip. Instead of being alert and on guard, I've compromised, going back to the one thing that You've set me free of.

Sigh, forgive me, Lord.

Cleanse me, restore me, and lead me back to the Cross. Remind me once again of the need to live a life that glorifies You. Rescue me and set me back on Your paths of righteousness again. Renew a right spirit within me, Lord. May the meditations of my heart be acceptable to You.

No where to run

Well, well. President Richard Roberts' day of reckoning is finally here.

http://www.tulsaworld.com/news/article.aspx?articleID=071002_1__Three07533

Psyched!

I'm going on my first overseas media junket next week! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!! It's some sort of Chanel product launch... I don't have the details yet. Anyway, I will be off to ... (drum roll) ... Paris!
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Nah, just kidding. It'll be in Singapore. :p

The next chapter

Two major changes come September:

Starting tomorrow, I'll be sharing a condo with two complete strangers.

Then, starting next Monday, I'll officially be a writer for the lifestyle section of TEM. Says a coworker, "You're part of the 'in-crowd' now. Don't forget us!" Hmmm.

How am I feeling right now? Incredibly excited, humbled and thankful... but also just a tad nervous.

Wanderlust

I feel the call of the open road...

Sigh, I miss roadtripping in the US.

Bits & pieces

When my own words fail, others say it for me:

"Struggling between the facts and fiction [...]
Everyone around me is trying to make a statement
Then there's me
I'm just trying to survive
[...]
Wishing I knew what I was looking for
Inside the disarray"

-------------------------

"Struggling with my thoughts
Change the locks inside my head
Reading between the lines
Of what you say
And what you said
I turn the radio on
To drown me out
Driving through the night to nowhere
Trying to forget
Who we were
And where it's at"

Guess who's gonna be a reporter...

Yup, that's right. My first assignment is on Monday, and I'll be reporting on an awards dinner thingy at the Hilton. Heck yeah I'm stoked. :o) Wish me luck!

Mane issues

I am convinced that my hair has a mind of its own, and this has been a source of irritation and frustration for awhile now. It flips at odd places and is -- get this -- wavy. My gosh, what ever happened to my super-straight Asian hair?!

I had my hair layered two months ago, and they are now growing out at neither-here-nor-there lengths. I am at a loss as to how to style it. It is dry and brittle and often refuses to be tempered, no matter how much hair oil, gel or balm I put into it. I have even switched to separating shampoo and conditioner, instead of using the 2in1 stuff that's supposedly bad for your hair. But all to no avail. Aick!

But hey, at least my hair is not as messed up as these models' ... ;)

My journey

I feel like I'm in a constant state of restlessness. I get bored so easily with what I do. I want to find some sort of footing where I'm at right now, but it seems to elude me.

I have a tendency to not stick to something -- be it a hobby, course of study or interest -- because I'm tired of it before it even had a chance to fully grow or develop. (Case in point: I had started out wanting to study law at uni, but two months into it I knew it wasn't for me 'cause it was -- as you might've guessed -- too boring. I switched to journalism and was tempted to change my major many times throughout the next four years but didn't because I did not want to start from scratch or end up graduating a year late.) But I'm not a quitter. I will see something through if I have to even if I don't like it.

I find myself impatient to move on to the next thing on my list. I don't set any long-term goals, because the thought of working towards only one thing for the next five years of my life is absolutely unappealing. And knowing me, my plans will change so much in that course of time that it'll be almost impossible to establish one plan to stick to.

I like change. In fact, I thrive on it. Some people have told me that I should find my direction in life and work towards building something of it, rather than "float through life". But you know what, I find floating through life a heck of a lot more desirable than going down one straight path. And really, what is so wrong about that? I'll admit that it probably is wiser to choose one thing and pursue it. But that hasn't been my lot in life, and I am fine with it. I don't feel the urgency to have it all figured out, and I'm just gonna take it one stride at a time. Plus, my heart is not ready to settle. Maybe in a few years I'll have all the restlessness worked out of my system, but until then, I will continue to explore my options.

A New Year to remember

I was a little apprehensive about going to Sibu to celebrate my first "real" Chinese New Year in five years because of the lack of modern conveniences at my grandparents' house -- no air-cond, no sitting-down toilet (I can't squat properly) and only ONE bathroom in a seven-bedroom house. I could never figure that out -- whoever designed the house was obviously not very bright.

My feeble attempts to weasel my way out of going was met by utter refusal on my dad's part. So I resigned myself to it, and braced myself for six days of sweaty discomfort.

But, to my surprise, it didn't turn out to be so bad after all. I adjusted after a few days there, and it was hard to not love being in the midst of nature. My grandparents' house is in the countryside, about 30 minutes away and across the river from Sibu town. The acres of land in the area consists of a few orchards and pepper plantations.

I felt so refreshed and rested there, a decidedly pleasant change from the hustle and bustle of city life. There's just something about being surrounded by greenery that does one's body, soul and spirit a load of good. The air was so deliciously fresh as it rained almost everyday, which helped to keep the temperatures cool, too, thank goodness. I loved falling asleep to the sound of crickets, but being rudely awaken by the jarring crow of a rooster way before dawn everyday was not fun. After the first night, my sisters and I were ready to slaughter the darn chicken!

One evening after dinner, we took a walk down the lane from the house. My older sister, Winnie, who's always had a childlike fascination for tadpoles (and frogs, for that matter -- I caught her dissecting one that she caught in our kitchen as a kid once, to my utter horror), led the rest of the kids in catching these tiny, slimy creatures in muddy puddles of water along the road. My youngest sister, Carina, had never done this before, and it was a delight to watch her light up with excitement and glee after finally catching one. There were beautiful, dainty purplish-blue and white wild orchids growing along the road, and we picked a bouquet for the house. Oh, the simple pleasures of life!

Another highlight of the trip was picking wild edible ferns one morning with my mom, Winnie and the two younger kids. Wild ferns are one of our all-time favourite "veges," which are stir-fried with garlic, ginger, salt and a dash of homemade rice wine. We hiked up the hill behind the house and spent a glorious hour picking out the edible ferns from the many other species of ferns and vegetation. At the end of the hunt, we had picked enough to feed everyone. We had it for lunch that day, and it was as good as I had anticipated, except I think my mom forgot to add salt, LOL!

Other than that, we did the usual -- visiting and catching up with relatives and friends, eating lots of mee sua in chicken soup (a Foo Chow staple), and of course, collecting ang pows.

I was a little sad to leave. You can be sure that I won't be putting up a fight about going to Sibu the next time round. Till next year!